Life Is Simple
but we overcomplicate it2012 already?
December was busy and then it was lazy, hence the lack of update, but (hopefully) I’m back on track. I’m going to talk about myself for the rest of this post. I hope no one minds.
2011 was an awesome year. I realized that much of my satisfaction with life stemmed from putting more emphasis on listening rather than talking, doing rather than over-thinking. I doled out a lot of advice over the past year, and observed other people’s actions and decisions more often than stressing about my own problems.
Sounds great. Effective. I was more in touch with friends and less focused on personal problems. I thought I had everything balanced. And maybe I did, for a while.
I initially decided to spend less energy dealing with my own issues because I felt that I wasted time when dwelling on them, which was true. But in a valiant and successful effort to stop over-managing my life, I consequently under-managed some aspects of it.
Maybe this blithe approach wasn’t a corollary of “good time management” but actually a result of me lacking the balls to confront problems head-on. And ironically, if I had taken some of the advice I shared, I might be in tiptop shape and wouldn’t feel as foolish.
So, lesson learned: my so-called issues won’t simply disappear when I spend time trying to fix everyone else’s problems. If I believe the advice I give is smart, I should apply that advice to my own life before criticizing others for not taking my suggestions.
Day of food & football
Made the colossal mistake of stepping on the scale for the first time since August. My jaw would have dropped to the floor if my extra chins hadn’t blocked its descent. So my resolution for the 4 weeks between Thanksgiving and Christmas is to eat healthier and stop being such a lard.
Regardless, this is still my favorite holiday and I’m thankful for pretty much everything and everyone in my life :) most notably, I’m thankful for stretchy pants, Michigan football, and Josh Duhamel’s abs.
Turning up the holiday music (:
Happy Thanksgiving from world's truest lards
Realism
Generally, I am not an impatient person. I like listening to others. If you have regrets, worries, frustrations on your mind, I’m fair game for conversation. But I’ve also learned a major lesson: complaining is not analogous to discussing. Repeatedly defining a problem is not akin to exploring possible solutions. I’m not cold-hearted – I’ll cry when you cry – but I’ve realized my life is far more manageable when I take a “tough love” approach.
We make decisions that sometimes lead to unwanted repercussions. It will suck and you will feel like shit (often justifiably) but if you continue to dwell, it will suck more and you will feel worse. Then, when you go to your friends with the same issues 7 months later after truly thinking about how to move on for a grand total of 0 minutes, they really won’t know what to say and neither will I.
So think and choose wisely. Recognize all possible consequences before you make decisions, take action, or say words – legitimately everything, from the unimaginably good to the unimaginably terrible. If any of those inconceivable outcomes arises, you’ll be a little more prepared. Somehow, we’ll subconsciously find comfort in knowing it wasn’t a fluke or some freak accident. In decision-making, be cognizant of what could happen both in and out of your control, and also be mindful that there still could be further ramifications that you have no way of perceiving at present.
Sounds dreadfully cynical, but it’s simply being realistic. Decisions also may lead to impossibly good things that we don’t normally consider beforehand! The fact that something awful happened, realistically speaking, doesn’t eliminate the possibility of an equally glorious future outcome.
As humans, we are predisposed to dwell on the drawbacks, but as I’ve said before, take time to remind yourself of the blessings as well. Balance the two. If harrowing pessimism and quixotic optimism had a baby, it would be practical realism (most useful baby of all time)
This might not apply to everyone; I can’t envision myself at age 16, 17, 18 even understanding this life application in full. But you can save yourself time and energy – stay pragmatic in your decisions, and man up when life punches you in the face.
